September 24, 2011

  • Trusting God ~ With my boys

    This morning I was cuddled next to the most sweet two year old boy. His little body perfectly "spooned" next to mine. I could head his heart and the sound of his breath. He laid so sweet, sleeping next to me. How I love my sons! How I treasure each moment with them. How fast time goes and how sad it makes me to think of the years when our nest is empty.

    As I laid with him I thought, (okay this is going to sound morbid, but it's not meant to) "What if God took me to heaven, do I trust Him with my boys?"

    When ever John and I talk about the "what ifs" in life, the one thing that weighs on us the greatest is our boys: who would raise them, who would love them like us, who would train them with our vision, who would be their "mom"?

    As I laid there with Clark next to me, I thought, "Do I really trust God with my boys?" "Yes" was my heart answer. I pray for the chance to raise my sons, to watch them marry and be dads...but if God's plan is to take me sooner, then He will gentle care for them. He knows what's best.

    Last night I watched the live stream of the Desiring God conference. Louis Giglio showed a picture, and in this small snippet of the galaxy was 10,000 galaxies...10,000!!! All the size of ours! 10,000! How do you even wrap your brain around that?

    With that thought in my mind, I laid there with Clark sleeping so peacefully next to me, and realized that this God that spoke all those galaxies into existence, cares for me, cares for my sons, and no matter what life brings my way, He's in control. And in that I will fully rest.

    How sweet it is to trust in Jesus! What peace that rushes over us. How in the world do people get by without Him! Praise His holy name!