It's 5:30 on Sunday morning! I can't sleep, I am just too excited, too overwhelmed, and eternally grateful for what happened this weekend. (Plus being asleep by 7:30, I don't need more sleep!) I can't believe God let us be apart of this movement: The Art of Marriage movement!

For those of you who don't know, John and I hosted a DVD marriage conference at our church this weekend put on by FamilyLife Today. There were over 600 worldwide and this was just the kick off weekend! There will be more of these marriage conferences in the weeks and months to come (we may do another one in the fall at our church). Check out www.theartofmarriage.com to see if there is one in your area and who knows, God may lead you to host one!

I was praying for 50 couples to come, but my husband and my mom kept reminding me that one marriage changed, one life changed would be worth it. 

We ended up with 34 couples, but I know those 34 couples were who God wanted there. About 4 couples didn't show up who had signed up. We (a team of people) had been praying 40 days leading up to the event. We knew that there were some God appointments there and there were!

Friday I was just overwhelmed by what was going to happen. I got news of sick kids, sick babysitters, sick husbands, and that overwhelmed me. Not in a bad way, just in a drive me to my knees way! I was up Friday about 5 am just crying and praying for this event. My heart wanted to honor God and give people tools for better marriages.

Friday afternoon we got everything set up to go, the church was ready, the kids were set with the babysitter, and now for the people to come!

Finally 4 months of planning, preparing, and praying it was here. Finally these DVD's which I had seen, were going to be seen by others! I was excited! 

After the session on Friday night it was neat to hear the reaction: "I didn't know these were going to be such great quality." "I was expecting a low budget production and this isn't low budget." "These are non-threating, but deep truth is being presented." "My husband and I are excited to see what Saturday holds."

Friday night the couples had their first homework assignment. Many stayed up late working and talked through their homework. 

Everyone came back on Saturday and the day went so smooth. We set up the event to really be about the couples. Not about fellowship time, although we did get to chat with others, it was mostly time for husbands and wives to talk, communicate, pray, work their homework, and just enjoy each other! 

Some of the comments I received:

"These real life testimonies are not hokey at all, but convicting and real."

"I am so drained, in a good way."

"Why are there not 500 people here to see this?"

"This has been so helpful."

One guy, who's been married 5 years and is a guys guy told us he just really enjoyed the conference. I told him that he can get up at church and promote the next one. (Lord willing we'll do another one in the fall) He was all for it. He said, "I'll tell those husbands who didn't want to come with their wives to come!" He seemed concerned for those wives who wanted to come but stubborn husbands who wouldn't come with! I loved that!

And many more comments along those lines. There were plenty of tears, lots of hugs, and you could just feel God's Spirit in that room.

We even had 5 couples sign up for the follow up Homebuilders bible study we're offering!

When we got home I was looking through the evaluations. The only complaint was having to sit for that long of a time in not so comfortable seats...I understand. But as I looked I realized that THREE people had committed their lives to Christ and all three signed up for the bible study! One even said that he wanted follow-up and ask where to begin! All Glory to God!! It was worth it...and that just seems like silly words, but it was WORTH it!

John and I got home worn out! I was drained in every possible way..spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Drained in a good way! John said, "Doing this conference with you was just awesome." Yes, doing ministry with him was the biggest thing I got out of this. It's easy for me to do my thing, him do his, but when we worked together, on the same page...wow, we grew so spiritually close to one another. It was so good for our marriage.

We are both committed to helping Christian marriages. This conference stirred a passion in both of us to help hurting couples. I am TIRED of divorce in my church and anything I (we) can do to help, we're going to do. We've both felt like this weekend was just the beginning! 

This morning I am reminded to pray for God's protection for those who came. Often times after a mountain top experiences we crash in the valley!

 I was debating if I should post this or not, but after the encouragement of two friends (both who thought it was helpful) I am posting the article I wrote for my local MOPS group!

Mom-Ology Challenge

            This month as we celebrate Valentines Day I want to challenge you women to spice things up in the bedroom! Yup, we’re talking about sex!

           Surprise your mate with a long, at home, romantic evening! It’s pretty simple and can cost nothing!

Here are some suggestions for this challenge:

Turn off the Internet, cell phones, TV’s, and iPods.

Prepare your bedroom during the day with candles, music (maybe music from when you were dating), and      fresh sheets.

Remove all kid toys and any other kid item from the room!

Find a nightie that he’s not seen in awhile.

Maybe get a nice bottle of wine or sparkling cider and make chocolate covered strawberries!

Then as soon as you put the kids to bed, head right for the bedroom!

Know you’ll have to wait for the kiddos to fall asleep, so use this time to talk about the first time you saw each other, your first date, your first kiss, your wedding or honeymoon.  You can even pull out your wedding album! (And don’t one time say, “Look how thin I was before kids!”) Forget talking about the kids, money, work, or dirty dishes left in the sink!

Make out, give him a back rub, give him 100 kisses all over his body and just enjoy each other!

I can guarantee this will be a Valentines Day treat he’ll remember!

P.S. My hubby helped me write this!  

God wants the first of our fruits: the first day of the week, the first hour of our day, and the first of our "crops".

Because God is gentle, He doesn't push or shove for the first place in our heart. He convicts and let's our hearts be willing to obey or not obey.

Since God really deserves the first of our life, then it will be what satan really wants! He wants the first day of our week, the first hour of our day, the first of our "crops", and the first of other things in our life.

I heard a talk, long before I became a mom, about how: Satan wants your first born. I wish I could remember the talk more, I just remember being left with the impression that satan will target my first born. 

Since hearing that talk I am amazed at how many firstborns are the ones that fall away from the faith. I guess I am thinking of really strong Christian families that I see this in. Those families where you go, "Huh? Not one of their kids! They did everything right!"

So again, it comes down to being on my knees in prayer for my boys and pray for protection. It comes down to living my life authentically before my kids and showing them, in our marriage, Christ and His church.

What are your thoughts? Do you think satan targets the first borns? 

Two weeks ago: 9:45 pm I heard Clark throwing up

20 minutes later Luke threw up.

Luke and Clark threw up for almost 5 days! (I must have done over 15 loads of throw up laundry and we're thankful for the carpet cleaner)

By Sunday John and Miles went to church because Miles was feeling great!

By Sunday afternoon Miles was complaining of a headache and ended up taking a 3 hour nap and woke up throwing up.

Then Monday Miles seemed a bit better...strange.

Slowly the other two came back to feeling normal. 

Wednesday I woke up throwing up.

Wednesday night Miles threw up again.

Thursday Miles was really sick, complaining of a sore throat (off to the dr. to make sure it wasn't strep).

Friday I was sick again.

Saturday we were coming out of the fog. 

Sunday Miles, Clark and I stayed home, just to be sure.

So today when we went to go run around our church gym it sure was a treat!

Being a mom is not for the faint of heart.

Only through God's grace do we thrive (or survive weeks like I had)!

Praying that anyone reading stays free and clear of this flu bug! It's no fun!

As we prepare for The Art of Marriage Conference that John and I are bring to our church, the topic of marriage, communication, conflict, and intimacy has come up in more conversations, between us and between me and girl friends.

One of the sessions is on intimacy in marriage and it's a pretty black and white, frank discussion of intimacy. The session lays out the importance of healthy intimacy and how it is a gage for your whole marriage. If that area is suffering it's just a gage that other areas need attention. 

I have found that this is an area that couples may find to be not of top priority in their marriage. Now for you singles that just doesn't make sense, but after a long day of kids and work, this can be just one more thing that can feel like a chore. 

I don't believe it has to be this way, nor do I think it should be this way.

As John and I have discussed this topic we realized that we've had to make a point to be very intentional with how we spend our energy and time at night in order to foster an atmosphere that is conducive keeping intimacy a priority. 

There's a couple of simple things that we do in order to be intentional:

1) Turn off the TV! We don't watch TV (except for Bears games...GO BEARS!) So at night when the kids go to bed you'll find us sitting in our family room talking or playing a game. I believe if most couples turned off the TV (or the internet), even for one night a week, would find they'd have energy and time for more intimacy. Do you and your mate watch TV for more than 1 hour a night? Just think of what you could do with that hour!?! Also if you watch TV chances are you stay up later and thus are more tired for your mate. 

2) We've also made our bedroom our sanctuary. Now this may sound narcissistic, but our room is filled with pictures of our wedding and honeymoon and also memorabilia from the beginning of our relationship. We've been very intentional to make our room, our room! I find our room to be very peaceful and a place that is all adult. 

I am excited about The Art of Marriage and for those couples already signed up! I hope they find that there is practical tips for all aspects of their marriage.

If you'd like to attend, check out The Art of Marriage website and see if there is one in your area! There's over 650 nationwide!

This Sunday is Sanctity of Life Sunday, thus the topic of abortion is every where I turn. I think of all those women who have secretly had abortions and carry the pain around with them. Those who have stuffed the pain and tried to cope silently. I wonder often how they feel when this topic is every where.

I also think of all the men who have been effected by this. I think we often overlook the guys who have had girlfriends or wives abort their babies.

I'll never forget that phone call in the fall of 1992, all he said was, "She did it."

We both wept. 

I had met him earlier that year working at Six Flags. Then later we worked together at another job. We struck up a friendship and he was just one of those guys who was always laughing and made those around him laugh. 

I remember when he told me he got his girlfriend pregnant. They weren't that serious but he was so upset that she wanted to abort his baby! There was nothing he could do to stop it. He wanted that baby. She didn't. 

So when I received that call we both cried, that's all we could do. 

I don't have contact with him personally now, but he's friends with a mutual friend on Facebook and I can see that he's a married man with kids, but I wonder if he thinks about his first baby. That baby would be 19 now. My how time flies. I think of that baby often.

My prayer is that men and women who are effected by the pain of abortion will be able to seek God's forgiveness and grace. Only at the foot of the cross are we made complete.

A The Foot of the Cross 

My wise friend Darci shared with us on our girls night out about this new book she's reading called: Unplanned.

I did a search and found the first chapter. It's beyond powerful and a must read. I can't wait to read the rest now!

Chapter One of Unplanned

Mom-Ology

A cheerful heart is

good medicine

Proverbs 17:22a

          How long does it take five busy moms to find time for a girl’s night out? Three of them work part time, two home school young children, two have all their kids in school, one babysits in her home, they all have home responsibilities, they all are involved in ministry, and they all have marriages to work on.

            So how long does it take: about 6 to 8 weeks!

            At least that’s what is happening right now among my friends. The last time the five of us were together was December 2009! So at the beginning of December 2010 someone shot an e-mail to all of us saying, “It’s been a year, let’s get together!”

            After a dozen or more e-mails, a couple of dates planned, other events interrupted us, we finally have January 16^th planned as a girls night out to HuHot! Phew! (crossing fingers it works out!)

Friendship

            In this season of being a mother of young children, having strong friendships is a key element in not going crazy! But in our culture we have to be very intentional about carving out time for our friendships.

            My mom tells of the days when she was a young mom. On her block there were many stay at home moms. They’d all meet at the park for play dates and no one had to call or set it up, it was just what they did. She almost had daily contact with other moms going through potty training, teething, marriage strain, and in-law issues. Strong friendships were built into her life.

            But it’s not like that anymore. I don’t have any other stay at home moms on my block, and daily contact with my fellow mommies comes mostly through Facebook and blogs. However, a phone call, a play date, a girls night out is like “good medicine” to my heart.

Building Friendships

            Like any healthy relationship, it will take time, vulnerability, and commitment. However building God honoring friendships into our lives will help carry us as we walk along this path of life, though each season, in every trial, and grow in our faith.

            This doesn’t happen over night or without some work. Without sacrificing your first emotional priority to your husband, you have to be intentional about carving out time to share and build into girl friends.

            If you’ve not had a night out with the girls in a year, get one on the calendar and be intentional in your friendships!

Pictures from our last girls night out:

 My best friend and my mouth

Lori and Darci

Lesli and Heather

Love you girls! Can't wait till Sunday!!!

This week I've been reminded of the amount of grace needed in mothering, in parenting. 

At times I rely on my own skill as a mom, as a Christian, as a church-going parent. I think that I am some how going to be responsible for how my boys turn out. 

Sure, I must obey God, teach my boys when they lay down, when they rise, when we move throughout our day. Yes, I have to plant God's truth deep into their hearts. I pray daily for them, with a cry of my heart that moves me to tears often. I beg God to give me wisdom, to give them wisdom, to grab a hold of their hearts, to protect them from sin that has eternal impact, and for boldness in their faith as they grow up.

But this week I was shaken back to reality that no matter what I do, it is ALL God's grace. It is for His glory, through His grace, and by His power that I mother my sons. 

I won't stop teaching them God's word, I won't stop praying for them, I won't stop correcting them, I won't give up the fight that is brewing in the unseen world for their souls, but I will lean so fully on God's grace. Satan wants my boys, he wants it badly. But I have power, power that he only salivates for!

At some point in the very near future my boys will have to choose, they will be responsible for their heart, their walk, their choice to give into temptation. It will be God's grace, all God's grace! 

I beg God for humility in parenting, for brokenness before Him. I beg God for grace in mothering. 

At the beginning of 2010 our goal was to organize and purge our house of extra stuff! It was a year long process and honestly we have a little ways to go...our basement! Okay, so maybe not that little, but it does feel good to have gotten so much cleaned and organized. 

Of course the areas I did at the beginning of the year can be gone through again, I believe this will be a life long process of de-cluttering! 

On the True Woman blog they are talking about the "Crush of Stuff" and yes stuff can really crush us! It can take over and our minds get cluttered along with our homes and our lives. It's all about intentional living! Not easy!

Watching my parents downsize this year was very encouraging and motivating. They moved out of a huge house, to a small one level house, perfect to grow old in!  

I know most people will say this, but in 2011 I'd like to hit my goal weight (by my birthday), so I have about 45 pounds left to go. I'm down 42 from October of 2009, so I think I can get there easily! 

That's my biggest goal for the year.

I will say that I am amazed at how different I feel being down 42 pounds. Yesterday I was a cleaning machine and I thought, "Where do I have all this energy?" Then I realized I am carrying around a whole lot less weight. Before I was carrying "Miles" around all day. If I had to do that now, I'd be zapped! So that was neat to realize. 

Always good to have a new year, fresh start, and back to a good routine!

What's your 2011 goals?